lost

I don't know what I'm waiting for, or if I'm even waiting anymore. Its almost like I lost all direction and am stuck floating in the middle of the ocean without sails, oars, or even wind. At some point I thought I knew what I was doing, where I was going, and the point of sitting her hating life in the meantime for something I wanted. The truth is, I have no idea what I'm doing anymore. I'm making up my thoughts everyday. I feel as if I'm about to do something extremely reckless and yet I know I wont. Its like standing at the verge of a waterfall. It looks enticing to jump and you know that there is just water at the bottom. But you don't jump, not because your afraid, but because there are stupid rules in your head that you live your life by. You may not even realize that there their, but they are. Guiding and effecting every choice you make. Some call it intuition others its just the voice in their head, but now your standing at the waterfall and you still want to jump and the voice is gone. You wait, expecting to hear it any moment but you know its gone and yet you can still hear it echo inside your head. So here I am, standing at the waterfall deciding if I want to listen to the voice that is no longer there or... just jump.